So it’s been a while since I posted! I got inspired to write as I am listening to a podcast about meditation while making Valentine’s Day Bath Soak for the caregivers at my daughter’s daycare- here’s a pic!
And here’s the recipe:
- 1/2 cup Coconut Oil
- 1/4 cup Raspberry Seed Oil
- 1/8 cup Rosehip Oil
- 1/4 cup Purple Brazilian Clay
- 3 cups Epsom Salt
- 3 cups Dead Sea Salt
- 0.8 oz Evening Primrose Extract
- 0.95 oz Polysorbate 80 (this disperses the oil in the bath so it’s not just on the surface)
- 0.4 oz Rose Quartz Fragrance Oil (Brambleberry.com)
- 0.7 oz Blushing Orchid Fragrance Oil (Brambleberry.com)
- A few dashes of copper mica until I liked the look
- Dried Rose Petals
- Topped with some dried jasmine blossoms
OK so back to my inspiration to write. Meditation. Listening to a podcast about meditation while making those jars (which was a last minute project- it pays to hoard sometimes ((take that Marie Kondo… except not really because I love you)). The podcast is called 10% Happier. It sounds so stupid. But I’ve listened to hours of it.
The guy who started it was a broadcaster who (ad nauseum) tells about the panic attack he had on Good Morning America (due to snorting too much cocaine, etc.) But now he talks about meditation in a way us non-patchouli stinking and non-pot smokers can relate to. So he’s ok in my book.
In his interviews he asks people about how they got into meditation. As I’ve been getting into it, I was reflecting on my own journey into it the past few years and how the heck I got to writing about it now. I’m super new at this… and I’ve been doing it for maybe 3 years.
It started when I got pregnant. A friend told me to get a doula. She framed it as “It’ll help your husband too.” Since we were both kinda freaked out about the birth process, I figured it wouldn’t hurt to look into it. Found an amazing person after asking my OB who she could work with (don’t want fighting happening between your MD and hired birthing assistant when it counts!). Her name was Kelly.
Kelly said that there was this Hypnobirthing class offered by my hospital (NHJAX) so I dragged my husband along. Honestly what made me commit was that she told me some helicopter pilot took the class and was able to deliver naturally and she was a badass the whole time. I’d never heard of a badass meditator. But I bet I could do it too.
I didn’t. I got induced which is the worst thing ever for being able to meditate your way through it. Also I sucked at it, the only thing I got out of it was this guided visualization practice that was SO STUPID when I first heard of it.. the Rainbow Meditation.
Yeah. STUPID. But it actually works. Kind of like when I got free acupuncture for the heck of it and it actually worked for my South American-water induced stomach issue. Then I learned to do it myself and used it on Navy SEALS and other military operators in the ER for chronic pain and they seemed to like it. So great, placebo or whatever pain was improved.
I’m still not a dreadlocked hippie who reeks of Nag Champa and boasts about how wonderful it is to be vegan.
Yet here I am years later downloading the app and writing a blog post about how it’s pretty good. In fact, … meditation is pretty darn great.
So to get to what you might be asking-why do I meditate? WTF is that anyway? The answer, at first, is that it helps me sleep. In the beginning I listened to (still do) to an app called Calm.com. I’d get home from work at 2 am and have no downtime. I’d lie in bed, rethinking all my work decisions and wonder if I made the right call. Or think of an email I still needed to write, or which car seat will be the safest and when is the right time to switch car seats again?
The “sleep stories” on Calm.com distracted my busy mind into something else: What it’s like to be an astronaut on the International Space Station and see Mercury from orbit, listen to John Muir’s account of a snowstorm on Mt. Shasta, ride along with an author on the Trans Siberian Railroad, etc. I can definitely say that I have had many more hours of sleep due to this app. I’m not even really sure if it was meditation though.
About a month ago however I got bored with this. What else is there? I’d heard the 10% happier podcast before but the guy’s voice is so nasal. So annoying. I tried some of the meditations from Calm.com. I got bored with the continuous “body scan” technique. I can only think about the tingling in my toes for so long before I just get annoyed with the voice of the person.
Somehow I found the podcast 10% Happier. Started meditating in a different way, in which I realize I AM F*#$ING CRAZY! I thought I knew what mindfulness is, but then they said what it can really be is that you are able to step back from the waterfall of thought and just observe it.
Your brain’s job is to think. It comes up with thoughts. And you actually can step back and see it happen, it just takes some work (aka metacognition). Then you start realizing how these random stupid thoughts cause you to not focus on the forest, and the thoughts in the moment are trees. You flit from tree to tree and thought to thought like a little squirrel and don’t step back to realize how much energy it takes. Meditation brings you up to see yourself in a different way, a more whole way.
Then I realized how meditation is kind of what I do when I’m running and I’m in the Zone. Clear mind. Or the breathing techniques I do when I’m about to try and PR my deadlift. The self talk when I’m deep in a back squat and am not sure I can complete the rep but F*&$ IT PUSH YOURSELF. The heart-rate calming I had to do every time I was exhausted but my kid vomited on me and I was miserable but couldn’t get angry. When a CPR in progress rolls through the door and all eyes are on me to run the code.
Of course while meditating you don’t think about becoming a better person or mom or doctor or anything. You just think about how much you suck at it. Your mind keeps flitting back to your To Do list and then you think “damn I failed at this clearing my mind thing.” That’s the point. Begin Again. Begin Again. Begin Again. Notice that. Bicep curl for the brain. Begin Again.
It’s not a religious thing. It’s not a hippie thing. It just helps you be the best You there is. I guess there’s more to it than that but I’m still new. Still listening to the podcast. Debating if I should sign up for a retreat, though I did sign up for a Jesuit retreat but it’s months away and I’m still on a waitlist.
Perhaps in the future I’ll post again about it, there’s so much to learn. I haven’t even read a single book on it, though I have a few on my list. Just gotta begin.
The Inspired Dr.Mom 